The other day I got surprised by my boyfriend when I was sleeping till late and he was already up. He had written something for me and I thought it would be interesting to share.
‘PIN UP… TO BE OR NOT TO BE…
I thought I would just write something whilst my beautiful pin up queen is asleep.
I am the boyfriend of a gorgeous pin up girl. This is not an easy task in a way that if you are a Latin and potentially jealous man, going hand in hand with a well kept monument day by day whilst many men roll their heads, well, let’s say that it is going to take a lot of patience and work from my side. From her side, there is only one task: Be absolutely glamorous and breathtaking, and oh boy does she succeed in that particular duty.
I am myself a rockabilly/pin up fan. I used to be a rockabilly back in the early mid 90’s when it was already démodé, and I enjoyed my fair share of pomps, greasy pomades, leather jackets, boots and tons of music by Gene Vincent, ElvIs Presley, Jerry Lee Lewis, Johnny Cash, The four Aces and of course the Stray Cats to name a few groups and artists.
I remember catching the attention of everyone around me and feeling misunderstood. Then, someone “like me” would appear to the scene, and the Teddy boys would be parting at large again.
Today I see some of my “old days” in my dearest and loveliest Miss Tulips. The way she carries herself, the way she strives for the perfection of the style. The glamour, the savoir faire. Always researching to accomplish that look and release herself personally through it. Let’s face it, this is a way of life, and by saying that I mean that Pin up is a philosophy of life. We explore the word in a different way and we obviously filter it through a different set of color glasses.
I am extremely proud of her because I see through this pin up enterprise a further objective. I see a true quest for self realization that has a wonderful side effect! It radiates beauty into people and makes head spins every corner she passes by. Sure it is not going to be a walk in the park everyday. There might be people that won’t agree with the style, even harmful people that might make fun of it. But true enlightenment comes from deep personal fulfilling. And may I tell you that this is the case.
Way to go my queen! I am your number one fan!
Lots of love’.
So this sweet message got me thinking about how fortunate I am with such a supportive and super sweet boyfriend, and what Mr. Tulips had to say about the men in the streets and him potentially being jealous. I can imagine for him, being an ultimate gentleman together with being very Spanish it is a test for his patience and his self-control to walk next to me. Not because I think I get so much attention, but because people of course stare and talk, it mostly being very positive and friendly, and he wants to protect me at all times. Of course I have had my share of vulgar and inappropriate comments, actions or looks if I am alone and out in the streets or out for a drink, but this never seems to happen when I have my Mr. Tulips by my side.
It makes me think about why the hell it seems to men that there is a freedom to just act inappropriate, yell out, say, and mime out whatever they feel like, not considering it might make a woman very uncomfortable and feel unsafe. Like all women do I have stood in front of my closet many a times before going on a girls night out thinking: ‘What shall I wear tonight? Maybe not that dress/top/skirt, it might be too revealing or short and it is going to be just girls tonight.’ And how wrong is that?! Where did this go completely wrong, and when did we decide that women should adapt to inappropriate behavior that men could possibly portray, instead of men understanding that women are not some kind of lust object that deserve comments, slaps on the bust etc. when they dress a certain way? And I am not only referring to women with a style that is more revealing or outspoken, also women that tend to dress very modest get comments for looking too frigid, too much like a goody two shoes etc.
It soon comes to the subject of certain people thinking you as a woman can provoke getting molested, raped or abused by the way you dress. NO! This thought couldn’t me more wrong and disgusting. These forms of abuse are performed by people that are not well in the head and not because a women dresses or looks the way she does.
Unfortunately I have been in a position where I did not feel safe because of some man putting his hands on me in a bar. I didn’t want to act upon it, but when the male employees of the particular bar didn’t leave me a choice I decided I had to make clear to him that he had crossed my boundaries by screaming at him and slapping him across the face. It was a very unpleasant experience but not nearly as unpleasant as some women have experienced.
But I want to encourage us women to keep dressing exactly the way they want! Don’t lose your style and your RIGHT to dress the way you feel good and beautiful about. No matter if your style is more revealing, provoking, modest, sensual etc.
I have been told many a times: ‘I love the way you dress/I love what you are wearing but I don’t dare to/I can’t pull this off/I would be afraid what people/my boyfriend/my family would say. And isn’t that a shame? Just go for it. Do what makes you happy!
Lots of love,
xoxo Miss Ginger Tulips